Rewards and Challenges

Today I am talking about the challenges and the rewards of grandparents raising their grandchildren let’s face it we like to hear the bad news 1st so let’s start off with the challenges that Grandparents raising Their grandchildren experience.
Grandparents raising their grandchildren face lots of challenges we’re going to talk about some of the challenges today.
One of the hardest challenges is social isolation. Most grandparents feel out of place with their friends because their friends don’t have small children. Also their friends don’t want to hang out with small children Plus they have already raised their Children. This requires grandparents to make new friends. It leaves basically 2 options for finding new friends 1st they can make friends with the grandchildren’s friends parents which means that they will be hanging out with people who are probably 20 to 30 years younger than they are personally I don’t have much in common with anyone that’s 20 to 30 years old . I am not real fond of their choices of music I don’t have any idea what they’re talking about when they discussed that sort of thing. I do not understand the majority of their slang terms.


Another way for grandparents to reach out and find other grandparents that are raising their grandchildren. The problem with this is a lot of grandparents don’t want to publicize that they are raising their grandchildren. In fear of being judged or blamed for their situation. They also may be embarrassed about why they have their grandchildren and want to it made public. Personally I am not shouting it from the rooftops why we are raising Our grandchildren but actually we kind of are by doing this vdoing channel.
Another of the biggest challenges is financial stress. finance is a huge challenge for most grandparents raising grandchildren because a lot of grandparents are retired and living on fixed incomes. They have not planned to have extra expenses that come with children. Extra expenses like clothes food a larger home and daycare. I know that when we started raising our grandchildren our electric and water bills both went up as well. Another large financial burden is the medical care whether it’s to be physical or psychological care theyllthese grandchildren require regular physical and emotional assistance. Many of us receive medicaid for the children and that helps out with a lot of those costs. But you still have to take time off work if you’re working you have to drive them and spend money on gas The expenses can just go up from there.

Another challenge for grandparents raising grandchildren are health issues we grandparents tend to put our grandchildren 1st and worry more about them than We do ourselves. Which means that if we have a slight cold or a medical problem we will put it on the back burner so that we can take care of the child 1st. This means that sometimes it Can get worse than it would have been had we gone to the doctor in the 1st place. I happen to have quite a few medical problems. I had them before taking in our grandchildren. Since taking them in it has gotten worse because I’ve not been able to take care of myself the way that I need to. we know that we need to make sure that we take care of ourselves and that something every grandparent needs to remember. We cannot take care of the children if not taken care of ourselves.
Grandchildren that are being raised by their grandparents tend to have behavior problems and emotional issues and this is a challenge for the grandparents to deal with. It requires a lot of patience and tone. You may have to take them to counseling or behavior therapy and other therapies. If they are delayed which is also very common in Grandchildren who are being raised by their grandparents.
You also learn new ways and techniques to handle problems associated with the child and the child’s behavior. These problems include feelings of abandonment, they have disruptions in their attachments, emotional problems, ] problems with their academic Performance. Many of the younger children have separation anxiety as well. This comes with its own set of challenges.


Another challenge is grandparents find themselves living in unsafe neighborhoods because it had to find a larger home in order to take the children in and because of the fixed income they may not be able to afford something and one of the better neighborhoods. A lot of grandparents when they retire or downsize to condos or rv s and the like. But in order to take in the grandchildren they need to have a home with enough bedrooms.
Another challenge that grandparents have is dealing with the loss of the golden years parenting instead of retiring and enjoying life. I’m not saying that raising grandchildren isn’t enjoyable it’s just not what most of us had planned to do. It’s very difficult to give up a dream that you had even knowing all the benefits that you are getting from raising these children. For example we had our house up for sale and we’re planning on buying an RV. We were going to travel around the country for about a year before settling down and buying a cabin in the mountains with lots of land. We were going to raise a few animals and just relax and enjoy ourselves and work on our different projects for me it was going to be a quilting and crafting and my husband was going to be working with wood and metal. We were going to take off for weekends on our Harley Davidson motorcycle. We had many plans.

One of the biggest challenges that some grandparents face is dealing with the adult children. Trying to deal with their substance abuse whether it be alcohol or drugs many adult children also have mental health issues. Sometimes they are in-and-out of rehab and depending on the adult child they may resort to stealing things from you in order to support their habit. Adult children may also be incarcerated that comes with a whole other set of challenges and decisions. When dealing with the adult children you have to deal with their sporadic contact sometimes not knowing where they are or who they are with and wondering where they’re living and if they’re living on the streets. As the 1 doing the raising you are the 1 left there to explain it to the children which is another huge challenge for us grandparents
Be a grandparent and raising our grandchildren also brings challenges of legal issues. Going to court and getting guardianship or custody. Deciding if adoption is the way that you should go. Legally what are you allowed to do for the children. I found that with guardianship I legally cannot change the child’s doctor or insurance I’ve also found that legally I cannot make decisions about the children’s education or religion. Grandparents need to decide if they should get an attorney. Which take us back to the financial challenge. It is all a vicious cycle.

Now let’s look at the good news the rewards this is the good part of raising our grandchildren.
When grandparents are raising their grandchildren that are many rewards the 1st and foremost and most obvious reward is love the giving of love and the receiving of love. For us Some of the most precious moments are when our grandchildren put their arms around Us to give a big hug. When they look up at Us and they say I love you, nothing warms our hearts more.

When our princess was about 3 years old she started copying papa and saying I love you more and it was just the cutest thing ever. She would just giggle if she said more before papa could. Its one of our little traditions that we started when we wee dating and now to hear the grandchildren coping us is music to our ears. But nothing will ever be sweeter than the sloppy wet good night kisses
The knowledge that our grandchildren are safe and are being cared for is a reward like no other. Just knowing that they are going to bed with their tummies full knowing that they have a bed to sleep in and clean clothes to wear. Knowing that you’re giving these children security and the knowledge that there are safe is amazing.
Be able to keep the family together is very rewarding. Keeping the children out of Foster homes where they could have more issues or more trauma makes most grandparents take their grandchildren in.
We find it very rewarding to see the joy in their faces when they learn something new or get something new. Grandchildren that are exposed to violence and drugs tend to show joy at the smallest of things. The eyes light up just when they received positive attention. You can see the joy on their face when you spend time with them. Nothing ever beats the joy that shines out of their eyes when they are happy safe and loved.
Many grandparents find it rewarding when they are able to raise their grandchildren to be able to show them their values and pass on their wisdom. Is rewarding to have this opportunity to guide the child into being a responsible adult. To be able to pass on your memories stories and traditions to these children as every Ward that most don’t get the chance to deal
Another reward that’s often said is that when grandparents are raising their grandchildren it keeps them young. It helps to maintain youthfulness and gives you more energy because you’re taking better care of yourself. This only works if you are taking better care of yourself so don’t neglect yourself. You are also a lot more active and so they say that you will live longer.
Many grandparents that are raising their grandchildren develop a deeper relationship with them then the children that they are not raising this is definitely a reward we found that raising Our grandchildren is more rewarding than raising our children because I have more time to spend with the grandchildren. When we were raising our children we were unable to stay-at-home as much as we wanted to because we had jobs but now being a stay-at-home Mimi and papa getting ready to retire we have the time to take care of our grandchildren. We also have more knowledge this time around in what works and what doesn’t work.
Raising Our grandchildren has taught us a lot of things We’ve learned how strong we are.
We have also learned not to judge other people We have learned acceptance I think raising our great grandchildren has made us better people.


We think the biggest reward is laughter since these children moved into our home we have laughed more than ever. We laugh at the things they say and the things they do. We laugh at each other and sometimes it’s not really funny. I grew up with my mom telling me laughter is the best medicine and I truly believe that every day every moment there’s something to laugh about. Whether It is Ed’s reactions to the baby’s dirty diapers or monkeys silly antics to make the baby smile. We laugh when we hear the strange sounds coming through the monitor and get tickled when we’re pretty sure she’s hiding an Owl in her Room. When I little sunshine laughs you can’t help but laugh with her. Her whole face lights up and her smile gets really big and her eyes twinkle.


So if you ever get the opportunity to raise your grandchildren be sure to remember that there’s going to be lots of rewards and challenges there will be plenty of blessings and laughs and positive experience and joy coming your way even through all of the challenges.

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